"Wot time is First Parade?"

         "Morning all, Private William "Basher" Bishop 'ere, batman to Colonel Bill, him what runs this 'ere wargames stores depot, wot we calls Colonel Bill's, up 'ere in the flippin' north of Engerland.
        When I ain't busy ironing the Colonel's uniform, bulling up his boots, bringing him his tea and crumpet of a morning ('e likes 'is crumpet, does the Colonel, know wot I mean?) or carrying 'im back from the mess full of 'is favourite port I'll be bringing you lot up to date wiv what's new in the Depot. Meanwhile, I best get busy; we're off on a tour of inspection soon,
Right, off you goes"
Basher