"Morning chaps.....Basher Bishop 'ere.....oooh me bleedin' 'ead....I'm feelin' a bit poorly on account of 'aving a few too many pints of Scroggins Mild last night on account of us, the Depot Deadeyes, winning to the Richmond District Tiddly Winks Championship 'eld at the Black Cat pub. The Old Man weren't too impressed, I can tell you, when I was late this morning wiv 'is tea and crumpets. Though I fink 'e wasn't annoyed on account of me being late.No, 'e was annoyed on account of 'aving lost some money coz I knows 'e backed our opponents and deadliest rivals, them lot from the Old Codger pub in Little Throckelton. 'ow do I knows that, simple, I found his bookies slip in the pocket of 'is battle dress trousers yesterday when I was ironing 'em. E's blew a whole 10 bob on a flutter; the Old Lady will be fuming wiv 'im now. She's got a gala luncheon or sumfink to attend and is lookin' to get a new 'at and there's was 'im tellin her they couldn't adfford to get 'er a new 'at everytime she goes to lunch. A right old domestic ding dong it was.
Anyway, when we got to the Depot this morning 'e sezs " Bishop, you blaggard, take your vile face out of the office and over to the QMs and give him these memos. I don't want to see you back here till 1600 hours, understand!"
Blimey, talk about a sore loser. Anyway, I'm orf to Dirty Den's, the Depot Don Jew-wan, wiv these 'ere meemos then it's the NAAFI canteen for yours truly for a cuppa....cor I'm gasping for a cuppa....pip pip!
Anyway, when we got to the Depot this morning 'e sezs " Bishop, you blaggard, take your vile face out of the office and over to the QMs and give him these memos. I don't want to see you back here till 1600 hours, understand!"
Blimey, talk about a sore loser. Anyway, I'm orf to Dirty Den's, the Depot Don Jew-wan, wiv these 'ere meemos then it's the NAAFI canteen for yours truly for a cuppa....cor I'm gasping for a cuppa....pip pip!
Depot
Memo
From:
Colonel Theo. Williams, Officer Commanding
To:
Doctor Proctor – Depot Medical Centre
Please be aware of the
arrival of 8 chaps from the Thirty Years War or English Civil War
period. They are all described as casualties, although I suspect some
may just be drunken malingerers!
I would be obliged if
you could check them over and report back to me as their fitness to
serve.
They have the following
identifications:
DBH027 C17th Dead –
or Dead Drunks
DBH028 C17th Wounded
Memo ends
20.12.2018
Depot
Memo
From:
Colonel Theo. Williams, Officer Commanding
To:
Lt Denham Scott
It has been brought to
my attention that we have some ‘good time girls’ at the Depot!
Please keep them under control whilst they are here. I will hold you
personally responsible for any ‘goings on’ between these strange
‘Belt Fed ladies’ and the other ranks.
As I understand it they
are named as follows:
BFG51 Prudence State &
Fanny Daly – Victorian Nannies
BFG52 Ruith, Alma and
Leith – Celtic Druids
Memo ends
20.12.2018
